A Beauty In Walking Away
by Wayward Victorian Girl
Summary: Amu is finally done with the past. The breakup, the cheating, the lying. She is ready to let it all go. And with the help of Ikuto, Tadase and her other guardian friends the future doesn't look so bad. Amu POV, Amuto, rated T for language and themes
1. The Sort of Prologue

**Disclaimer: do not own. at all. never will. **

The phone snaps shut. And I can't help but think that it's ugly. It's an ugly sound, it's an ugly phone, I'm in an ugly place. I grip the phone harder, hard enough to make my knuckles turn white. What happened? What the hell happened? I'm burning holes into the window and no answers are coming.

Instead, my mind is speeding, replaying the conversation over and over, out of chronological order so I can focus just on what he said. I feel a few angry tears leek out of my eyes, but I hastily wipe them away. I'm done crying over this whole stupid mess.

I think back to Kukai's words. At first I couldn't believe my own ears, but the thoughts connected and my logical thinking came into focus. Why the hell not. It sure would explain a lot, and I can't help but feel this may have been half my fault. Yes, it all made perfect sense. My breath is visible in the cool night air as I audibility growl.

Past memories are thrown up into my face. I knew they had still been in the back of my mind, but I never wanted to really look at them again.

Never again.

The events leading up to this are coming back too, the recent ones. It's almost like watching a poorly edited video of my life. I can still remember the phone call, and that heart wrenching feeling, snippets of his words and excuses. God, I was such a fool.

The phone is shoved in my jacket pocket as I close my eyes and turn around. I'm heading in the opposite direction, because I done. I am finally done, finished with this whole thing. The leaves under my feet crunch as I step on them one by one. Each one is cheering me on, each crunch is one small applaud. My foot is just about to step on the first stair when I hear my name being called out.

"Amu!"

3 seconds, then I turn around, because I'm still pretty pissed off. The voice is also male, which leads me to believe it's _him_ who's calling for me. Call me irrational, but I still had that shrewd of tiny hope he would show up and disprove everything I heard. Which, I know, makes no sense. I've already proved I was a fool; I don't need to do it again.

I look over my shoulder, pissed off face ready, yet its completely wiped off as I glance who it is. To my somewhat pleasant surprise it's not he who we shall never mention again, but rather someone who I haven't seen in quite some time. And yet he can still make a light blush spread across my cheeks.

Tadase jogged up to me as I turned around to face him completely. He was breathing a little heavy, but smiled at me. "Amu…-san, there you are. Kukai and Yaya called me, saying something about how you were upset," Tadase questioned, examining my face "and I was in the area so I came."

I laughed a little. "Wow, Yaya sure can dial fast. Um, yeah, yeah everything's fine. I think. You know what," I turned to look up at him (when did he get so tall?) and feel a small wave of optimism rush through me, "everything will be fine. I'm done. I'm done."

I smiled a small smile. A smile that held all my regrets and sadness and anger, then let them go. It was with this smile I would finally lay to rest the past. I wouldn't run away anymore, and I certainly wasn't going to hope on false dreams. Dreams that wouldn't come true, dreams I didn't want to come true.

Tadase looked at me, puzzled. The expression was soon replaced by another gentle smile. He grabbed my hand and pulled me in the direction I was heading against.

"Okay, I don't know what happened, as Yaya said I had to run over here quickly, but judging from your face it seems you'll be fine. You're Hinamori Amu; you're the most preppy girl I know."

"Actually that's Ran, but yeah, I guess I can be preppy too." I smiled. Then, I realized we were headed past the street I normally take to get to my house.

"Uh, by the way, where are we going" I asked, looking around. I wasn't being dragged anymore, yet Tadase was still holding my hand. And yet, I wasn't complaining. Though we were now about a block from my normal route home.

"To Kukai's house. Yaya and Rima are over there, Yaya is worried and I think Nadeshiko will be over there soon." He stopped suddenly and looked in my eyes.

"Unless you have something else you need to do?"

I contemplated the situation. I could turn back, go home, walk through the door and stare at the wall for hours planning some sort of revenge or I could have a good time with people I care about and who care about me. The answer was pretty obvious, I didn't think about it for very long.

"No, I don't have any plans. Let's go!" This time I grabbed his hand and started to walk.

Oh yeah, things would be great. Especially since a revenge plan was already forming in the back of my mind. Even the grey clouds in the sky were clearing. That had to be a good sign, right?

"By the way," I let go of Tadase's hand and we walked side by side, "you don't have to add the –san after my name. We've been friends for a long time now. I think it would alright for you to call me just Amu."

I said it calmly and casual but I still a small blush on his cheeks. It was actually kind of cute. Sort of. Wait, I've been down this road before; okay, so I saw him blush. No further comments.

"You're right. We've known each other since 5th grade; I can drop the –san. If it makes you happy…Amu." More smiles. We were just full of smiles today! Of course when ever I'm with Tadase I'm usually all smiles. Don't read so far into that though.

"Uh-hm, it does, Tadase-kun." I replied

The rest of the walk up to Kukai's, which actually wasn't too far from my house, was filled with just topic-less chat. It was nice to just talk about nothing, literally. It was even better to not have to answer or discuss what had happened to make Yaya call Tadase come and get me. Though I knew that wouldn't last long. I was sure to get pummeled with questions when we arrived.

"So tell us what happened, Amu-chi!" Yaya exclaimed once everyone had settled around the kotatsu in Kukai's living room.

Did I not say this was going to happen? I do believe I did. I could only sigh in exhaustion; the whole thing was just plain exhausting.

I looked around at everyone's faces. They were all staring back at me, waiting for my reply. Rima was even sitting slightly forward in anticipation.

"Wait Yaya, you already know what happened." I counter argued. Kukai also knew what happened to make me so upset since he was my prime source of the information. He had heard everything from…_him. _Alright calm down, we're not going to talk about him, or even think about him anymore.

"No I don't! I just heard from Kukai that you were probably upset, and thus being the fast dialer that I am I called Tadase, to make sure you were okay!" Yaya waved her arms and was talking with her hands, explaining how she didn't know EXACTLY what happened.

I shook my head. "Alright, alright, I'll tell you—" I was interpreted by the doorbell ringing. I smiled to my self, knowing who was at the door "—right after Nadeshiko settles in!"

I got up and jogged to the door, pleased that I had some more time before I had retell the stupid story. I heard Yaya groan quietly; that girl loves drama. It's a good thing I understood this and wasn't getting mad at her or there would be some more drama going down.

I threw the door open and outstretched my arms, closing my eyes while plastering a wide grin on my face.

"Nadeshiko!"

I stopped the insane smile to look at her look at me with an expression of amusement and confusion.

"Hi Amu…uh, not that I mind, but why the big greeting" she questioned as I stepped aside and motioned for her to come in.

"Oh, ha ha ha. No reason; what am I not allowed to show my best friend how happy I am to see her," realization hit me square in the face "I mean, uh, him?" Wow, I will never get used to that.

But she smiled at me as she placed her shoes with the other shoes. "It's fine Amu; you can still call me a 'her'. I guess you're still not that custom to it."

I laughed nervously and looked around. The silence was a little awkward but it was soon shattered by Kukai calling for us. I forgot about the whole somewhat awkward situation and shouted back a quick "Yes". Nadeshiko followed me back into the living room, and we sat down near Rima and Tadase.

It wasn't even two seconds before Yaya was urging me to tell them what happened. Another sigh; my distraction was short lived.

Oh well, maybe getting this thing off my chest would help. I had already decided I was done. Just to finalize those plans I would talk, I would benefit from taking those memories and throwing them straight into the trash.

Goodbye foolish Amu. You were too naïve to ever make it in the real world.

TBC

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**A/N: ****Clarification: **

**Amu**** and everyone is in high school. Nadeshiko is back from Europe and Ikuto **_**will**_** be in the story but not until probably the next chapter.  
I also do not know where the guardians went; they may be in the story, they may not, I'm not sure at the moment. **

**Anyone want to guess the pairing? **


	2. Chapitre 2

**Disclaimer: Do not own Shugo Kyara (Chara)  
Thank you to ****SunamiHV, Xiao Jie, euca1995, jess, Innocent Butterfly, kiki8778 for your reviews!**

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Blank stares. That's the only thing I received while I recounted my little sad story. There was in depth detail at certain points where I had told no one what had happened and some summarization. I included Kairi's, as best as I could remember them, from that god awful phone call that ended everything.

And of course the part that Kukai already knew, the part that made me so mad and upset was also spilled. I know I saw Tadase's eyes light up with something that looked like anger and I heard Yaya and Nadeshiko gasp when I told them Kairi had cheated on me with two different girls. The worst part: it wasn't even twice, it was multiple times.

A story that spanned over about 5 months only took me about an half an hour to tell. Once I started to talk about it, it felt a lot better just saying everything that happened along with how I felt about it.

No one said anything after I finished speaking. They hadn't interrupted at all either, except for gasping. We all just sat around the kotatsu, feeling the blanket's warmth in comparison to the cool air circulating through Kukai's house. I had been talking for a while; it was kind of nice to just sit in silence.

The atmosphere wasn't awkward; rather everyone was soaking in the information. And of course it must have been a little shocking.

Since our breakup, I had never told anyone exactly what had happened between Kairi and me. From their point of view it must have been like seeing him and I together one day and then the next, boom! We avoided each other like the plague.

I had told Yaya what happened, vaguely, after she had asked if something was going on. It was after school and Nadeshiko was walking home with us. Or at least, we were supposed to go to home. I'm pretty sure we ended up getting ice cream because I had burst into tears half through admitting Kairi had broke up with me.

It wasn't even mutual. I had no choice. I couldn't even help but to still like him, for months after that. I kept my distance but my heart still hoped he would realize he enjoyed us being together. My hopes were futile.

I stretched my legs out under the table, accidenly hitting Tadase's foot with my own.

"Ah! Sorry, Tadase-kun" The silence was broken.

"Why didn't you tell us this sooner Amu-chi?! I would have punched the day lights out of him. Actually, now that I know he cheated I think I will!" Yaya made to get up but Kukai caught her arm and forced her to sit back down.

"No, Yaya, I'm going to beat him up. Besides the most damage you'll do would hurt your own fists." Kukai narrowly dodged Yaya's smack.

"Argh! You! I could do some damage to him! Just look at my muscles!" she lifted up her sleeve to show us her 'muscles'. Everyone sweat dropped at her noodle-thin arms.

"No, Kukai and Yaya do not need to do anything; I will surely hit Kairi so hard it might kill him. Oh what a shame that would be." Nadeshiko smiled with her eyes closed. The venom dripping from her words was making a small puddle on the floor. Scary. I knew Nareshiko still had that Yakuza side of her.

Oh god, I should have expected this. Before everyone created their own plans to attack Kairi, I quickly cut in.

"No, no! Really everyone, it's fine. I mean, we've been broken up for what, 5 months now? And it's not like he cheated just yesterday!" I was doing a mini flail with my hands, moving them like windshield wipers in front of my body, trying to explain why they really did not need to beat him up.

"But…Amu. He didn't just cheat once. You said it happened multiple times, and with two different girls." Tadase's expression _seemed_ calm. That façade shattered when I looked straight into his eyes; they were almost red with fury.

"Err...well…"

Rima, who was sitting on the other side of me, hugged my arm, though she also had a calm expression, if not with a hint of sadness.

Okay, really, this was all starting to freak me out. I was being treated like I was some sort of abandoned puppy. Like I need to be protected and my abandoner needed to be punished. In the case of the animals this is true, but for me it doesn't work.

Hadn't I already resolved to take care of myself? I was finally getting up on my own feet. It had taken me months to finally see I didn't need Kairi anymore. It had taken me months to finally see how pathetic I had been.

And I was not going to throw away this new sense of independence.

"Everyone!!" Everyone's planning Kairi's death was interrupted by my shouting. Ten pairs of eyes glued themselves on me. I guess I sounded really angry since Yaya seemed taken aback.

"Look," I softened my tone; I wasn't angry at them. "I understand that you guys have good intentions but really. No one is going to beat up Kairi, I'm fine and will be fine, and it doesn't matter how many girls he hooked up with. It's in the past, let's just leave it there."

Yaya got up and ran over to me, throwing her arms around me and tackling both Rima, who still clung to my arm, and I. All three of us fell over.

"We know you'll be fine, you're Amu-chan!"

"That's the second time someone has told me that." I looked at Tadase and our eyes locked for a second. I smiled remembering how comfortable it was walking with him.

"Well if you ever need the crap kicked out of Kairi, you know who to call!" Kukai exclaimed and flashed me a thumbs up. Nadeshiko nodded in agreement and smiled.

"Alright! Now to cheer you up Amu lets play DDR! Kukai, can we play DDR?" Yaya went from our dog pile near the kotatsu to the TV set in a matter of 2.5 seconds. I will never understand where that girl gets all her energy.

"Sure" Kukai laughed and got up to help Yaya set up the game. Rima let go of my arm, got up, and sat back down under the kotatsu. I was guessing she wasn't going to play the game for a while since when ever we try to get her to, see comments on how horrible she is at it.

Nadeshiko announced she was going to make some tea and Rima offered to help. For the remainder of the evening all we did was play DDR and ate some pizza that Nadeshiko and I made. It was really relaxing and fun, though I went home earlier than everyone else. I knew I was expected to be home at 11 but my house was only about a 10 minute walk from Kukai's. Tadase offered to walk me home but I declined; the time spent with my friends was nice but I needed some alone time too.

The night air was the perfect temperature for it being middle March. I was so worked up from playing DDR, I didn't even have to wear my jacket.

The streets were quiet and illuminated by the moon, and I felt really peaceful. I was so hyped up I started to twirl playfully as I walked down the street to my house. All of the lights were off, so I knew to be extra quiet when I unlocked the door and took off my shoes inside.

It was dark in the house, but the moon peaked unto the windows upstairs so I could see as I made my way down the hall. I looked at the moon from my position on the end of my bed. But suddenly something completely black blocked it from my view through my sliding glass door.

I squinted, wondering what is going on, as I looked at the black figure and up into the face of…

HOLY HELL!

Ikuto was standing on my balcony, a playful smirk plastered on his face. He was leaning on the wall next to the sliding door, arms crossed, and he mouthed to me, _"So, are you going to let me in?" _

TBC

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**A/N: I actually like Kairi. Not at first, but in the 6th volume he becomes awesome and nice.  
I hate to make him the bad guy here but someone had to play it and I don't like to have OC characters. ****  
The pairing for this isn't final yet but it will most likely be Amu x Ikuto.  
Before we get to that though there is going to be Amu x Tadase moments.  
And the boys are probably going to fight over her so be prepared for some drama!  
Kairi will also be in this, but I'm planning on not making him get back together with Amu.  
The chapters are short but I hope the next few will be more than 4 pages long. **


	3. Chapitre 3

**Disclaimer: Standard still applies**

**This is rated T for a reason; you have been warned!**

We stare at each other for a good 5 minutes; Ikuto is looking at me with a mix of concern and confusion. And maybe a little bit of lust. Good god. I, on the other hand, am still sitting on the edge of my bed, mouth slightly open, wondering if I should let him in.

A little voice reminds me that Ikuto has come over before, why would this time be any different? In middle school and junior high he would always scare the hell out of me by suddenly popping up on the balcony. He also surprised me once by coming to my house, through the front door that time, and meeting my parents. I swear my mother had hearts in her eyes. Let me just say that entire evening was a little awkward and embarrassing.

I snapped out of my nostalgic thoughts and walked slowly to open the door. I had managed to slide the door open wide enough for his hand to slip through and force the door to the side. He used a little too much force since the door slid open fast and made a loud bang against the other door.

"Ah! Be careful, my parents are asleep already!" I whisper yelled. He stepped inside my room and closed the door, quietly this time.

"Why are you here" I questioned, still whispering, though the angry tone I had earlier was absent. Not that I minded him being here, I was just wondering what he was doing in town.

"Well, I had a little free time, and Utau pretty much forced me to come back here with her. So, since I was in the neighborhood," he slipped his arms around my waist and pulled me into his chest "I decided I would surprise you with a visit."

I don't think my blush could have been brighter. Thank god it was sort of dark in my room. Remember, the moon was pretty much acting as a lamp right now. But I'm guessing Ikuto could still see me blush, since he smiled and chuckled.

I can't help it! With Tadase, when he makes me blush it's pretty easy to suppress, but with Ikuto I can't even control myself. I don't even understand why.

"O-Oh! Well, um, err, thanks?" More blushing, more wishing I could cover my face with something.

He released me from the 'hug' and suddenly I felt disappointed. "I was going to come over earlier, but I saw you and the little prince walking, and holding hands." He turned away from me and looked out of my windows.

Hold on…did I just hear some, jealously in his voice? I think I did, I think Ikuto is jealous!

Now was my turn to smirk, as I walked over to him. "Are you…jealous, Ikuto-kun?" He wiped around and I lifted an eyebrow. I knew my eyes were sparkling with amusement. What, I never got to tease him; it's usually the other way around. I was relishing in the moment.

"Of course not, I was just wondering why you would let him hold your hand. You're single and I know he likes you. Maybe you like him too" He questioned. I stared into his eyes, looking for any unmasked emotions. Sometimes he let them slip, but this time I found nothing.

I sighed. Not this again.

"Ikuto, seriously, how many times must I tell you that Tadase and I are just friends? Just friends! That means we do not like each other! Maybe you just want me to start liking him" I crossed my arms over my chest.

He frowned at me. "Of course I don't want that to happen."

"Then what do you want to happen" I inquired

Let me just give you a little background info on my relationship with Ikuto. It took me a while, but after I understood that Tadase and I were better just friends, I realized Ikuto was the one I liked. I had even planned on telling him. But I was too nervous, so I never found the courage to voice my feelings. Though I did let him know I had moved on from Tadase. I just never specified what I had moved onto.

A few weeks after I realized I liked Ikuto, the new school year started. I was finally in junior high! But I had totally forgotten Ikuto wasn't in high school anymore. I did remember him telling me one night when we were sitting on the ledge of my balcony that he was going to Osaka for college.

He never told me when he was leaving though. So that night after my first day of being a junior high student, I stayed up all night, waiting to see if he would come and visit me one last time. He never came, and I didn't see him again until my last year of junior high.

I later found out he didn't want to make me sad about not seeing him anymore, so he just left. He claimed it would be 'better that way'. I responded by hitting him with a pillow when he told me that.

Anyway, Ikuto came back to see me the same year Kairi and I started going out. It was in the summer and about 2 weeks into my relationship.

I was surprised and excited and anxious, all simultaneously. The whole thing was just nerve racking. Ikuto was back then the only guy that could make me completely forget about my 'loving' boyfriend. In our small reunion, my past feelings suddenly came rushing back, so fast they made my cheeks burn with a blush. I was so happy to see him and so scared.

Now don't get me wrong, I liked Kairi, a lot. When I first started hanging out with Ikuto again, it was a little awkward, since I believed I still liked him. After a while, it seemed clear to me that Ikuto just wanted to be friends. So I ignored my feelings and they eventually went away.

Now, I'm not sure how I feel about him. It was only recently that I stopped being hung up on Kairi, and I still think it's a little too soon to start something. Especially since I keep forgetting that promise I made to myself to be independent.

All of my experiences so far have just shown me how difficult it is to be involved with love. Love and I obviously didn't get along.

Maybe I'll just shut myself away for a little while.

I suddenly became aware I had been spacing out, and Ikuto still hadn't replied to my question. Thought it was mainly a rhetorical one I was still slightly interested in hearing his answer.

"Hm, I'm not sure. Maybe we'll find out." More smirking. I narrowed my eyes. He was teasing me again.

So, I pushed him hard. Or at least, I _meant_ to push him hard, but I ended up just placing both of my hands on his chest and using all of my energy trying to move him. It didn't work, and I started to pout with annoyance.

Ikuto just laughed, grabbed my hands, plucked them off of his chest and laced our fingers together. I felt myself blush, but it was only very light. Thank god.

"Amu" he stared me directly in the eyes. The gaze was so strong I couldn't even look away. I was beginning to wonder what was going on, what was he going to do? I was half afraid and half excited.

"…it's getting late. I better let you get your, what do girls call it, beauty rest?"

Before another smirk to even form on his perfect lips, I grabbed the nearest pillow and chucked it at his head. He easily ducked and it hit the window with a soft thud and slid to the ground. Well, there goes my dream of being a pitcher.

He walked over to the sliding door and opened it. "Goodnight Amu." He was about to walk out.

"Wait!" He turned his head over his shoulder. I was sort of regretting saying anything. But I didn't want him to leave without telling me if he would be back.

"When…when will I see you again?" I started at the floor as I asked my question, hands behind my back, wringing my fingers. I was slightly embarrassed since my question sounded so cliché.

He thought about it for a moment before smiling and replying with a simple "Soon". Then he walked out of my room, closed the door behind him, jumped onto my balcony's ledge and jumped down to the street.

I watched the balcony for a few minutes after his departure, just zoning out. It had been over Christmas break when I last saw him and Kairi and I broke up two months after that. So, naturally, the last thing I remember talking about was my break-up.

All I remember about that night was how Ikuto had let me say what I needed to about Kairi and the whole thing, what happened and all that, and then he had talked about everything under sun except relationships, guys, love and breakups. He never even gave me the chance to think about my lame ex-boyfriend.

He was also the only one I had told everything to. I mean everything. Details about what went down, and how I hated Kairi and how I still loved him, about how I secretly hoped we would get back together. Maybe it's because I have special relationship with Ikuto that I don't have with anyone else.

As I got situated in bed, I thought about this relationship. And how scared I was it would all fall to pieces if we were involved romantically. I was scared of rejection, scared of heartbreak, scared of letting someone in again only to have them trample on my heart.

Not that I think Ikuto would ever do that to me but when love is involved, everything can change. It's enough to finally make you yell "FINE! You know what, love? You can just go to hell and burn down there for all I care. You always have to tip everyone's world upside down and right when they flip it back over you do it again! Just so you can have a good laugh!? Well, fuck you!"

Yeah, I think I'll stay with friends right now. I'm done with guys for a while. It's too much stress. Unlike sleeping, which is so nice and comforting…

...

I totally forgot that Monday means school. The weekend was so relaxing I pushed everything school related into the back of my cranium. Well, except for homework, because I have a really big project due today and I had to finish it over the weekend.

No, I completely forgot about the new 'fun information!' I learned about Kairi this weekend. That is, I forgot about it, until I saw him in the garden today. And then like a wave of angst it washed over me and my calm mood did a complete one-eighty.

My new mood was probably the reason why, when Kairi saw me and waved me over, I completely ignored him and walked away, over to where Yaya and Tadase were discussing something guardian related.

This went on for the rest of the day. I did talk to Kairi, but very little, as in my words and sentences were short and contained an underlying tone of disgust and annoyance. Maybe anger too. It was a mix because I pushed all of my emotions into it.

I never bothered to see Kairi's reaction to my treatment of him because, frankly, I really didn't give a damn anymore. He has the nerve to cheat; I don't care what he does with his pathetic life anymore.

Once a cheater, always a cheater.

I heard about him later on though, as Kukai and I were walking home. Kukai and Kairi are pretty close, and they have been since Kairi came back to school with us. I didn't mind them being friends after our breakup, even though Kukai offered to shun him. I didn't even prohibit him from hanging out with us when we all went out.

I thought I was being nice, but now I know I'm a much better person than he is.

"So, he didn't say anything, but I could tell he was obviously confused with your behavior." Kukai bounces a soccer ball from one foot to the other as he speaks.

"Well, I think I'll give him the silent treatment for the rest of the week. Then I guess I'll talk to him normally again." I laugh. It feels awesome to be in control.

"But Amu, aren't you even mad" he asks, moving the soccer ball up to his knee and into his outstretched palm.

I ponder the question for a second, before responding with, "Yeah, but only a little. I know I'll forgive him later on, but right now I'm still upset. And I know I'll probably continue to be friends with him, but not right now. I need time" I sigh dramatically.

Kukai laughs and waved goodbye when we reach his street. I start to run home partly because of my hunger and because I want to just laze around the house before my parents get back and I start my homework.

Monday is the only weekday I don't have anything to do after school. So, I usually take that time and install it into watching all my favorite dramas I taped. I'm only watching three series but they air later at night and on days I have activities to do.

So my Mondays equal couch potato days! I know, I know, my life is so exciting. Just call me Amu the house hermit. I'm so glad I have friends like Yaya who make me get out of the house, or I think I might stay inside for the rest of my life and become a vampire.

By the time my parents and Ami get home, I've already started—and finished half of—my homework. The rest of the evening was fairly average. Ikuto didn't even come by, which made me feel a little disappointed. I ignore that feeling though. I honestly don't even care what happens to my love life. I'm only 15, almost 16. I've got plenty of time.

...

"Ahhhh" I sighed as I dropped my bag on the table and sat down. It was after school on Friday, a whole month and a half after the truth about Kairi was revealed. I had stopped giving him the silent treatment, and we talked to each normally again. Heck, I even forgave the bastard for everything he did! But that didn't mean I was going to forget about it, at least not yet.

Nadeshiko was on my left and Kukai was across from us. Our classes were closer to the garden so we always got here earlier than the other four.

"Tired, Amu" Nadeshiko asked me as she flipped through her folder. I nodded, remembering the horror of last night. Not that anything happened; there were no nightmares or anything like that. I did, however, stay up past two in the morning chatting with Ikuto.

"The meeting shouldn't take that long," Kukai reassured me "unless Kairi makes us go over every _single_ detail for the festival."

I groaned at the last part. The school festival was to be held in two weeks, which meant the student council, namely us, had to make sure everything was organized. We had finished all of the administrative stuff, so now all we had to do was make sure each class was starting on their planned activities.

It was all very dull. And stressful. Mostly for me since I keep getting less and less sleep.

"Are you are alright Amu? You don't look so good" Kairi commented. Great, it was even more apparent than I thought.

I resisted the urge to hiss at him. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just tired. I didn't get a lot of sleep last night."

Nadeshiko gasped dramatically, "Was it because a certain someone was keeping you up by visiting you at late hours in the evening again?!"

My head had previously been resting on the table's cool surface, but it shot up when I heard her say that. It caught everyone else's attention too. Or maybe my mini-flail did that.

Of course Nadeshiko, being my best friend, knew about Ikuto and how close he and I were. How could I not tell her about how I thought I liked him and how he left and how I was worried I would start to like him again even though I had Kairi? She was suppose to, however, keep that a secret and not let it slip that he came to visit me!

I slapped, gently and as quickly as I could, both of my hands over her mouth. "Ha ha ha, what are you talking about Nadeshiko, you silly goose! Ha ha ha!"

I'm pretty sure no one bought my lame cover up. Though for the record, I really wasn't expecting them too.

"Ooh, do explain." Rima urged with a curious tone, though her face was the same calm it always was.

"Yes, Nadeshiko, please explain." Tadase added, though I could tell he was a little livid. And maybe…I internally gasped; was he JEALOUS?!

"No, no, nevermind! Don't mind me and the crazy words that just pop out of my mouth. I'm going to, um, go make some tea" She got out of her chair and walked out of the room. I knew she had accidenly let the information slip, so I wasn't mad.

The room was quiet for a few seconds, until Kairi spoke out "I think we should get back to business now." So, thankfully, the attention was off of embarrassing subjects and back onto meaningful tasks. For now. I saw Yaya shoot me a 'oh you are definitely telling me about this later!' look.

I opened my bag and pulled out my notebook and some pencils. I was in such a rush this morning, I forgot to grab my pencil case off my desk, so I only had my two back up pencils today. I placed them next to my notebook, but one started to roll away and fell on the floor.

"Oh, let me get that" Tadase leaned over to pick up the pencil. "Aah! No, it's fine" I replied, also leaning over to pick it up. We both reached it at the same time, fingers touching. I blushed and withdrew my hand.

He sat back up in the chair and smiled as he handed me the pencil. I was still blushing as I took it. I smiled back, feeling a warm feeling spread through my body. I stopped suddenly, wait. What the hell was that?

"Alright…Amu?" Tadase asked with concern. I nodded with a quick 'uh-huh' and focused on pulling out the rest of my stuff from its containment in my bag.

I could hardly focus for the rest of the meeting. The same though kept running through my head, _'Don't tell me I'm starting to like Tadase! Please tell me this is not the case!!'_. I tapped my pen against my notebook, just spacing out and letting my mind wonder.

What I was really concerned about was letting my independence go. I still wasn't sure if I was ready to jump back into a relationship just yet. I tapped my pen against my lips now, while studying Tadase.

He was talking about something; I wasn't really paying attention to what was being said. I was more taking into account how he became very serious when we talked about student council duties and how right at this moment I found him acting similar to Kiseki.

I could feel my little grade school crush coming back the more I stared and pondered him. My gaze may have been a bit too intense because he noticed and looked at me with big curious pink eyes. I felt my face light up in a subtle blush, and I swiftly looked away.

About three seconds later I peeked back at him. He looked at me again and our eyes locked for a brief moment. I felt butterflies. It was a little electrifying. As I held his gaze I smiled warmly. Maybe I could get back into something…

TBC

* * *

**(I was going to put that Ikuto stayed with Amu, as seen in Chapter 28 of the manga. But I am disregarding the entire chapter for reasons to be shown later in the story. Please also disregard Tadase's confession. Oh, and I'm sorry for spoiling it for those of you who haven't read the chapter yet. Sorry!)**

**A/N: Killing the author is not permitted. **

**I know you all want Amuto, I understand. **

**This last little bit of the chapter DOES serve a purpose to the bigger Amuto picture—it is NOT just mindless fluff advocating of Amu getting with Tadase. **

**And Thank you for all the reviews! They help me continue to write this story and keep up my motivation for updating. **

**I think this may be the longest chapter so far; hope you enjoyed it jess ! **

**I'll try to make the next chapters longer, packed with Amuto moments, and updated as quickly as I can manage. **


	4. Chapitre 4

**Disclaimer: The normal drill  
EDITED ON 4 AUGUST **

* * *

I'm not good at anything.

_I'm not good at anything._ That single thought replays in my mind time like a tape player that jammed. I listen to it quietly, thinking about what it **really** means.

I haven't moved from my seat in four hours. I haven't taken my eyes off the same paragraph in fifteen minuets. I haven't gotten anything done. I haven't even got dressed yet. And Tadase and Nadeshiko are supposed to be here soon.

Well, technically I am dressed. I just haven't changed out of my pajamas – two layered tank tops with my cropped sweat pants. And my hair is piled onto of my head in a semi-messy bun. I have visitors coming and I'm not even going to change. I think the stress is getting to me. That or being tired. Actually, I blame it on a combination of both.

The pure exhaustion of the whole situation overwhelms me. My eyes close as I bang my head on the desk. It hurts to close them; it feels good to give them a rest. The broken tape player has switched to a new phrase; _I hate AP tests_.(1)

I reopen my eyes at the sound of the doorbell. I sit up and untangle myself from the bomb of papers around me. The nap helped my mood a little; at least I don't feel like screaming to the person at the door and then slamming it in their faces. Because I'm pretty sure that's not how I want to come off to my crush and best friend.

Crush. Yes, crush. I'm sure we're all screaming right now, I know I did when I first realized my feelings. Well, more like they suddenly shot up out the box I though I disposed of, and slapped me in face.

But it's like this: I cannot help it. I cannot help but be attracted to Tadase. And this time it's not that huge. Yeah, I learned something from middle school. I know the feelings were there and I accepted them. However, I wasn't going to try and get with Tadase, another thing I learned from all those years ago. Yup, I was just chilling with everything right now.

Everything except the exams.

Refocusing on why I had walked all the way downstairs, I reached for the door and put a smile on my face. I may look like a mess but I didn't want Nadeshiko and Tadase to think I acted like one. That smile quickly dropped as I saw who was leaning against the doorframe. _Oh, great._

Ikuto probably saw my smile fall and be placed with a small 'o' but that didn't stop him from smirking and then leaning down so his face and mine were about 0.5 inches apart. Okay, exaggeration but still! I totally felt that blush creep up my face.

"Well, sorry to intrude," but I could tell he wasn't sorry by his smirk "but I was just passing by and decided to give my favorite girl a surprise visit."

I narrowed my eyes at him. Why, now, of all times did he have to pop up and visit? And I don't mean because I have people coming over.

I haven't seen him for months and he picks now, TODAY, to just "say hello". I couldn't help but notice the flip my heart did at hearing I was his favorite girl.

I decided to take a completely different reaction than be all moody with him. I replaced the smile I had on earlier. "That is so thoughtful of you," my voice dripped with fake joy "but I'm expecting someone so, unfortunately, I have no time to chat."

I went to close the door, but Ikuto was too fast, putting his foot in the doorway. Not letting the door close, not letting me escape that easily.

His hand pushed the door back open and looked at me. "Are you going to invite me in?"

I stepped aside and let him enter, then proceeded to closing the door. I had no idea how soon Tadase and Nadeshiko would be here, but I figured I could let Ikuto say whatever he wanted and then leave before my guests arrived.

He stood in the entry way, not taking his shoes off. I saw this as a good sign; maybe he would leave sooner than I thought.

"So, you're expecting somebody" he questioned, as I leaned on the front door.

"Yeah, just…um, some friends."

He nodded and stared at the wall. I studied his face. I know I already admitted to myself that I liked Tadase, but I noticed how absolutely hot Ikuto was. Being in college he didn't wear a uniform anymore. Now every time I saw him, he wore a pair of jeans with sometimes casual shirts, sometimes more dressier shirts.

He must have noticed me staring because once I snapped out of my thoughts his face was once again about an inch from mine. And the blush was back.

Why does he do this to me? No, why do I always respond to it?

He smirked at me— he does that a lot I noticed— also noticing how close our faces were. I tried to back up more but it was futile; the door was flush against my back. I had no escape.

Ikuto looked down at me and placed his hands on the door, locking me in. I breathed deeply, forcing my blush down. Somewhere deep down I felt jolts of electricity and excitement pulse. I mean, look at us! Our current position was more than a little risky.

"Ikuto"

"Hm?"

I opened my mouth to say something. But the sound of the doorbell filled the air. We stood there for a minute, him starring at me obviously not willing to move and me with my mouth slightly open, my words caught in my throat.

I turned, forcing him to take his hands off the door and scoot back a little, and opened the door to see my long awaited guests.

"Uh, Tadase, Nadeshiko! What a pleasant surprise."

Silence. I looked at them. Nadeshiko looked at me and Tadase stared at Ikuto. And then…

"What the hell is he doing here!" Tadase shouted his question so loud I thought he would wake up the entire block. Ikuto, who had been staring at the wall to the right of the door, turned and smirked in response.

He leaned over from behind me, "I was just leaving. We had a long night last night." I blushed, Tadase's face became a light shade of red and Nadeshiko opened her eyes wide.

"No, no, he was just—" I was cut off by Ikuto leaning closer to me and placing his lips on my ear, whispering "I'll see you later babe."

And then he coolly straightened up and pushed passed a very flustered Tadase, walking out my front gate.

We all watched him go, until Nadeshiko turned to me with a smile and a wink. "So, someone had a busy night. But whether you look tired because of so much studying or something else I'll find out about later."

"Wait a minute! We didn't do anything! He was never here last night. I heard the doorbell ring and I thought it was you guys so I opened it and there he was." I moved out the doorway as a gesture to come in.

Nadeshiko giggled as she walked by me, and Tadase followed, still looking a little red but a lot calmer than earlier.

I grabbed his sleeve as he walked in. He looked down at my hand and then into my eyes. I swallowed before saying as seriously as I could muster, "I'm not lying. There's nothing going on between me and him."

Tadase smiled and placed his hand over mine. "It's alright. That damn cat would probably make up a lot of things just to get me rallied up. But, I do believe you"

I smiled back and he walked past me into the entry way. As I closed the door I felt a small brush of calm inside me. But I also thought about how good it felt to feel Ikuto near me. And that single thought caused me to wonder just where my heart was headed now.

* * *

I press my palms into my eye sockets. Nine whole hours of studying, writing, reading, quizzing and eating. I'm exhausted from it all. Tadase is beside me still writing some summaries of notes and Nadeshiko is resting her head on the coffee table.

I'm actually surprised we didn't have to relocate to the dinning room table; we have ten books, five notebooks, one case of flash cards and two thick piles of notes spread out on the table.

I let out a deep sigh and drop my hands to my lap. Nadeshiko has also opened her eyes, lifting up her head and stretching her arms. "Ahhh, wow. We've been working for a while now, huh?"

I'm so tired the thought of how long we've been working, trying to pack as much information in our minds as possible makes me crack a smile and chuckle a "yes, we certainly have."

"Well, I think we deserve some tea. Is it alright if I go in the kitchen and make some?" She asks me, as I close the notebook I had been reading.

I nod, "Do you want any help?"

"Oh, no, I'm sure I'll be fine. Why don't you just…stay here." She gives me a little wink before walking into the kitchen. I feel my cheeks redden as I understand what she is implying. Good thing Tadase is so focused on that textbook.

I look around the room wondering what I should do. Just looking at the pile of textbooks gives me a headache and I'm not tired enough to sleep on the hard wooden coffee table.

Just as I'm about to get up and help Nadeshiko anyway, Tadase closes the textbook and looks at me. His pink eyes are sort of dulled out, showing he is just as exhausted as we are.

"Only one more day and then we have the test" He says, resting his head back on the couch behind us.

I nod, feeling my stomach sink. Oh god, one more day. One more bloody day. I exhale to calm myself, and remember I've been studying for months now. No amount of cramming can improve my score.

Tadase sits up and places his hand on my mine. "Its okay, we'll all do great. I mean, we've been studying for a long time now. And there are only three tests to take."

I can barely register what he is saying. I'm too busy blushing like a mad woman and staring at our hands. It would be fine if my hand was on the table. But oh no, my hand is resting on my thigh. With Tadase's hand on top of mine. Which means his hand is technically on my thigh.

I'm about to have a nervy spaz.(2)

Tadase looks down at our hands and I can see the blush on his face too. He pulls his hand away as if it were caught on fire. We stare at each other for seconds, as I feel my blush creep further up my face. It's enveloping me.

"Sorry I, um, didn't realize…" Tadase apologizes.

I shake my head. "No, its okay, it wasn't bad."

We look at each other again. God, this is sort of embarrassing. I breathe a little more deeply to return my face to its normal paleness. I'm sure by now I look like a tomato.

As I drag my attention away from the corner of the coffee table, back to Tadase's face. He is staring at me, almost in an anxious way. I hardly have any time to ponder this expression in his eyes when he leans forward and presses his lips to mine.

And alarms go off in my head. Mind you, we were sitting pretty close, so it didn't take more than two seconds to close the gap between us. And since it came rather suddenly, I'm completely floored.

But it isn't too bad. I mean, I have wanted this for a while now right? I slowly place my hands on Tadase's shoulders and he puts a hand on my waist.

I close my eyes, ignoring the alarms in my head and relax a little. And then a very scary thing happened…

…I pictured kissing Ikuto. I even fooled myself into thinking I was kissing him for a second. Then my brain kicked back into gear and I realized this wasn't it.

Or more like, I realized I was kissing the wrong guy.

"No." My hands pushed Tadase's shoulders away, breaking our kiss. He looked at me with confusion, though I could see he was a little dazed.

"No, I can't. I'm sorry, I just… I can't." I withdrew my hands, bringing them in front of my chest.

Tadase's shoulders fell a little and I instantly felt a pang in my heart. "Oh, I see."

"Its not you. Really. I mean…." My eyes looked around trying to translate my thoughts into coherent words, sentences.

But Tadase has his trade mark smile back on. It's a little weak but it was still there. At least I didn't break that.

"It's fine. I understand. You're still recovering from what happened with Kairi, right?"

"Uh…yeah. I thought I could deal with this. But uh, I guess I still need more time."

"Take all the time you need. I understand."

I am evil. I am evil. I am the worst person in the world. I don't need any time. Well, actually maybe a little. But no, my heart has pretty much decided who it wants. I let depression fall over me a little. But I know he doesn't think of me like that.

Do I never learn? I look at Tadase, who is looking at me with a bit of concern and laugh to myself. Nope, I never learn.

I give a small chuckle. "Well, I don't know about you, but I never want to see another AP review book again."

"That's for sure" Tadase laughs with me.

We're still laughing quietly when Nadeshiko comes back in the room, tea pot and three tea cups on a tray in front of her. She looks from me to Tadase and back to me. I notice her smile and from the look in her eyes I know I'll have to tell her what happened in her absence.

An hour later, Nadeshiko and Tadase gather their things and I walk them out the door. I wave good-bye at the gate and turn around to go back inside. It's about late afternoon and I know Mom, Dad and Ami will be back in an hour or so.

I'm very very grateful they opted to take Ami to the new amusement park and let us have the house to study. I mean, I would die of embarrassment if my dad had walked in on Tadase and I.

Not that we were full on snogging but still.

I replayed our "moment" as I shut the front door and trudge up the stairs. I am so exhausted I just want to crawl into bed and dream little happy dreams. And not remind myself that tomorrow I would be doing a little more studying.

I groan out loud as I open the door to my bedroom and walked in, closing it with my back. The sun is setting outside and its pretty dark in my room, so I switch on one lamp.

The light illuminates a tall figure leaning against my wall. I was not expecting that and I let out a scream, taking a step back and tripping over one of my shoes. My head bangs against the wood floor.

I knew I shouldn't leave things lying around on my floor. One of these days I'm going to trip over something and break my neck.

"Ow"

I sit up and Ikuto just about rushes over. I thought I saw a flicker of worry grace his face. But that could have been my imagination. It's been acting up a lot lately.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. I think."

I rub the back of my head, wincing slightly feeling a small bump. Oh lordy lord lord. I am definitely keeping my room clean from now on.

We sit there, or well, I sit and Ikuto continues to kneel beside me, for another minute before my rational (ha!) thinking clicks. I scoot back quickly, back hitting the door and point at Ikuto.

"AH!"

He stares at me like I have suddenly gone mad.

"You! Why are you here? And why must you always give me a heart attack whenever you come over here? Or do you like waiting for people in their room with the lights out. Are you a vampire!?"

Ikuto stands up and turns his head to the side, looking out my balcony door.

"Please. Didn't you hear me tell you I would see you later?"

My mind went back to this morning: _I was cut off by Ikuto leaning closer to me and placing his lips on my ear, whispering "I'll see you later babe." _Blimey.

"Okay, fine. I just wanted to see you."

I study his face and he a small flush of pink. Its so small, its barely there. But I can see that he is embarrassed from actually telling the truth and not being all 'cool and smooth' like he usually is.

He turns back to face me. I stayed where I was, in my comfortable sitting position against the door. Well, actually it wasn't that comfortable, since I was half sitting, half kneeling and my legs were right beside my thighs and it was sort of killing my knees. But, anyway, he was still looking at me when he sat down in front of me.

I turned my head and narrowed my eyes, speaking to the floor.

"Well, that's nice. You think you can just waltz into my room anytime you please. Lovely. Really."

I turned my head back. And there merely inches away from my face was Ikuto. That oh-so familiar blush was back. He smirked and lowered his eyes. I felt my own eyes become half-lidded too.

"Of course. Because you and I both know something. Something that little King and every body else should know too."

My voice was low, almost at a whisper.

"Oh? What would that be?"

"'You're mine.' "

He pressed his lips to mine.

And I have no more control.

* * *

****

(1)Advanced Placement tests for those of us in the AP classes. And what I was studying for when I first wrote this, two whole months ago DX  
(2)Like nervy b. From the Confessions of Georgia Nicolson. Very good series.

**A/N: I am so sorry for not updating sooner. Tried to make it as long as possible. And of course leave you with a sort-of cliffy. :p  
Thanks to everyone who reviewed! **


	5. Chapitre 5

**Disclaimer: Standard still applies.**

NOTICE: I made this as long as I could because I'm not sure when I can update again. School starts in a week. So the next chapter is going to take some time. Thank you.

* * *

Here is what happened when Ikuto said with his husky voice, 'your mine', and my knees turned to jelly: My stupid brain failed

Here is what happened when Ikuto said with his husky voice, 'your mine', and my knees turned to jelly: My stupid brain failed to work right, which was why I wrapped my arms around Ikuto's neck and didn't complain when he pulled me closer to him.

His lips were so soft. All my previous thoughts flew from my mind, and especially the thoughts of Tadase or Kairi. In fact, this was intense snogging! I had never been snogged like this with Kairi; I usually had to do most of the work.

He tilted his head to deepen our kiss, causing me to gasp which gave him the opportunity to lick the bottom of my lip. Ohmygoodygodgod I wondered if we were going to get to number 8! (1)

I actually enjoyed the feel of his lips on mine, the smoothness of his hair as I ran my hands through it and even being sandwiched between the door and Ikuto himself was kind of nice. Yes, all of that was great. It was all great until I heard the front door open and the shrill voice of my younger sister.

I did the first thing I could think of: pushed Ikuto, and those amazing lips of his, away. Now, he is looking at me with a mixture of lust and down-right confusion.

"Wha…what is it?" he says, loudly

"Shh! I just heard my parents, which means they are back early from their little holiday!" I whisper-shout at him.

"Ohh…," he inches closer to me, but whispering this time, thank god "well, we can still go back to what we were doing."

Suddenly he is kissing my neck, and I have to fight with my brain to stay in control. I close my eyes, still listening for my parents' voices but also relaxing against the door. God, this feels good. Remind me again why we hadn't done this before?

He pulls away and leans in to kiss me again when I hear loud footsteps pelting up the stairs. Then a call of: "Amu! My lovely older sister, where are you?"

Blimey. I shove Ikuto off of me again, but press my hand over his mouth before he can speak.

"Uhh, in my room, Ami! Just…getting changed." I call at the door. I hear her footsteps stop. Then I hear her open the door to her bedroom, which is a room from mine.

"Okay, but hurry up. Mum said dinner is going to be ready in twenty minutes." The door slams softly.

"Right. I'll…be right there!"

"Amu, you don't have to talk anymore." My head whips around to face Ikuto. He is looking at me with those eyes…and hey, since when were we holding hands?

"Err…right. Um, right. I…was just…um." Make words Amu! Complete sentences, anything!

"Ah! You know, I should get changed, before dinner I mean."

He looks at me. "Okay, sure, go right ahead."

We don't move an inch. Oh, this is ridiculous. I stand up and pad over to my closet, leafing around for a pair of jeans and a shirt. I shut the door and lay the clothes on my bed, where Ikuto is currently sitting, and stare at him.

"What?" he asks

"You know what! I need to change!"

"Go ahead."

I stare at him. What does he think that I'm just going to change in front of him! "I _mean_ I can't change with you watching me."

"Hmm…well, I guess if you want me to leave…"

He gets up from the bed and stands directly in front of me. He bends down and captures my lips with his again, and wraps his arms around me. Then just as I am about to relax and kiss him back, it's over.

He looks at me for a while, opening his mouth and closing it again. I continue to stare at him, totally not in control of my brain right now, which has been turned to mush. He decides to say nothing and instead kisses my forehead lightly before letting me go.

He's walking toward the balcony door, sliding it open. I can still stop him, turn him around and snog him senseless if I wanted. But instead I stay rooted to the floor. He walks outside, closes the door behind him and jumps down to the street below. And I'm still standing here. Suddenly, everything that just happened hits me with full force.

Ikuto snogged me.

IKUTO snogged ME.

Ikuto SNOGGED me.

…Oh my god!!

And the weirdest part; I really want him to do it again.

* * *

The desk feels really nice against my face. I'm so sleepy it's not even funny. I am also very lazy and my head hurts from lack of food. The fact that the bloody AP tests are tomorrow (TOMORROW!!) does not help my mood.

I move my head and groan into the desk. I hear a giggle next to me and my head is off the table almost as if I had just been burned. Nadeshiko is sitting at the desk next to me, just smiling and giggling. The surprised shock expression on my face flees.

"Oh Amu, I don't even have to ask what you are so unhappy about. But just remember, we all have to suffer through it. Plus you've been studying since, like, January!"

She continues, "I am rather interested in hearing about what happened between you and Tadase. And also what happened when Ikuto came over later."

My eyes just about triple in size. How does she know he came over! "How do you know he came over?!"

She gives me a blank look, almost a confused look. "But I remember him saying that 'he would be back babe' when Tadase and I arrived at your house…"

I smack my forehead, lightly though because I need as many brain cells as I can get for tomorrow. Am I the only one who didn't remember him saying that? Before, you know, I did remember and then we….oh god.

"…and I'm sure Tadase remembers too, because he was pretty angry. That and I asked him what happened yesterday and all I got was him turning red as a tomato. So…want to inform me on what I missed?"

I let my hand fall from my face and take a deep breath. "Nothing. Well, almost nothing. Something but really nothing."

Insert confused look from Nadeshiko.

"Okay, alright, fine! We…um, well more him but, anyway! We were…snogging and then something came over me and I freaked out so, I pushed him away. He thinks it's because I need more time to get over Kairi. Which I do but…"

"But…?"

"But…then uh, Ikuto came over last night andhesnoggedmetooandIthinkIlikehimlikemorethanIvelikedTadaseevenallthoseyearsinmiddleschoolandIkutoisanamazingkisserandohgodwhatdoIdo?!" (2)  
I'm utterly out of breath I said that all so fast. Surprisingly enough Nadeshiko doesn't look confused, almost like she understood what I just said.

"Easy, you get with Ikuto. He is a fine specimen, but don't tell him I said that."

"Then what do I do about Tadase?"

"Um…tell him the truth?"

I give her a look. Then, "I can't just tell him the truth! I mean, what do I say; 'Oh, by the way Tadase I figured out I quite rate Ikuto more than you and last night after you snogged me, well he came over and snogged me too, so now I think I'll go around with him'?"

"Err, well not quite in those terms but yes, that is what you should tell him. I think he would be hurt if he knew you lied to him."

"Well, I don't have to lie. I just have to make sure the truth doesn't come out? Oh lord, I'll have to lie! I don't want to lie to Tadase; he's still one of my best mates!"

The gears in my head are beginning to spin. "I've got it! I'll just have to avoid him until I can figure out what to tell him!"

"Well you better hide, because he just entered the classroom."

"Oh god."

"It's okay, he hasn't spotted you yet! He isn't even…oh crap he's coming over here. He's head straight toward us!"

"Quick! Pretend we are talking about tea!"

"Wait, tea? What has tea got to do with anything, you were going to tell me about Iku-"

Tadase stands right between our desks just I say "Oh yes, I do love that new lavender blend!"

"Whats going on?"

"Hm? Oh, we were just engaged in a very interesting conversation about tea, weren't we Nadeshiko?"

"Oh yes, very lovely conversation. You know tea, is just so…"

"Tea like!" oh my god, I'm losing it. Quick I have to gain control of the situation! Erm…err…ah ha!

"Well," I stand up and they both look at me "we must be off. Lots of things to do, people to see, uh last minute cramming to do! Ah hahaha!" There is no way they can think this nervous laughter is NORMAL.

"But Amu, there's only like five minutes left until class starts again. We've only just had lunch; the school day isn't over yet." Tadase informs me.

"Ohh…" I stare a head, rooted to the floor. I've lost it, what am I doing! They must think I'm a loon.

"Are you okay Amu? You don't look so well, is it because of yesterday with the ki- uhh, that…thing that happened?" Tadase looks at me with wide eyes and side ways glances at Nadeshiko. He figures she doesn't know. Oh ho ho how wrong he is.

"Oh, oh! Oh, no, I'm um…just feeling a bit under the weather. You know, with the test tomorrow and things of that sort."

"Oh, okay," he kneels down beside me and touches my hand, which is lying on my thigh again. Oh my god. "Because I wanted to talk to you about that; are you free after school?"

"Erm…yes. I'm pretty sure that would be alright." It's getting so much easier to lie. Well, I cant just right out and tell him, 'actually, that makes me feel a little queasy. Could we maybe reschedule for next year?'

"Great, so I'll meet you out front when school is over," everyone is getting back into their seats and he stands up to leave, "see you then."

"Uh-huh. Bye."

Once he's gone, I look at Nadeshiko. She shrugs her shoulders and gives me a weak smile. I turn away from her, face the front of the room and bang my head down on the table.

* * *

As I'm packing up my things, I feel a pull at my heart. I'm so nervous to see Tadase again; I have no idea what I'm going to tell him. I play out different scenarios as I walk out to the front of the school.

There's always the possibility he will say, "I had a great time snogging you, but I think it would be better that we stay friends and not take this anyway."

Or he could say, "Yesterday was great; wanna do it again sometime soon?"

AHHH!!

I can feel my face visibly pale. I shake my head, trying to clear my mind and figure out what I'm going to say. Okay, deep breathing. Yes, think of happy places, people you really care about, people you just want to throw against a wall and snog senseless….

OH MY GOD. I'm becoming more perverted by the minute. And of course I just pictured actually throwing Ikuto against my bedroom door and snogging him to within an inch of his life. Oh lord, how am I supposed to have a clear chat with Tadase if all I can think of are these pervy thoughts?

But honestly it's not my fault. He just gets me all… oh lord. Oh lordy lord lord.

I'm focusing on my deep breathing as I walk out the gate…and right into someone. My bag and the two books I was carrying drop to the ground and I hear the sound of a case hitting the sidewalk. We bend down to pick them up as I ramble on apologies.

"Ah, I'm so sorry. I wasn't watching were I was going. I'm really really sorry for…" I look up at who I bumped into and almost drop my things all over again.

Ikuto is smirking down at me, adjusting his violin case over his shoulder.

"Fancy meeting you here, Miss Hinamori."

"Cut the talk, what are you doing here!?"

"Well, I see someone is excited to see me. Am I not allowed to see my favorite girl? No I'm kidding, I was in the neighborhood about a block away and I thought I would see if you were out of school yet."

"Ah ha! Well then!" I pause. Wait a minute that was, really sweet. "Oh…that's really nice of you actually. Yes, I'm out, but I was supposed to be meeting—"

I'm cut off as Tadase jumps between Ikuto and I. I'm so surprised I jump backwards and clutch my bag to my chest.

Tadase has a fiery look in his eyes and I'm wondering if he's going to spread his arms shielding me from Ikuto.

"What are you doing here, cat?" I can hear the edge in Tadase's voice too.

"Nothing. Just hanging around the area." Ikuto has the usually calm, cool tone to his voice. I think he keeps his temper because it pisses Tadase off even more.

"Well, if that's the case, why don't you just continue on your way. Amu and I have important matters to attend to." More edge to his voice. See what I mean?

"Ahhh," Ikuto shrugs his shoulders, "I guess I'll leave," He pushes Tadase lightly out of the way and runs a finger down my cheek, leaning in so our faces are literally inches apart. "See you later gorgeous. Little prince." And he turns away and walks down the sidewalk.

Tadase's eyes blaze with jealously and fire and they are seriously red. His whole face is red and I'm concerned he's going to explode any second. Me, I'm still in LaLa land (3).

I can still feel Ikuto's smooth fingertip on my cheek. Truthfully, I was going to pull him down and snog him right there but, um, I'm not so sure that would have worked well with Tadase.

Before I know what is going on, Tadase whips around and puts his hands on my shoulders. He looks straight into my eyes as he says, "Be careful Amu, I still don't trust him. Why were you talking to him anyway?"

I'm still a little dazed that Ikuto was here (to visit me! Yay!) that it takes me a second or so to reply.

"Uh? Oh, I just bumped into him on accident. I was just walking out of the gate not really paying attention and…yeah. It was my fault; I started the conversation."

"Oh, I see. Well, I still don't want him near you, he could be dangerous."

I give a little giggle, "Ah, Tadase? You wouldn't be…jealous perhaps, would you?" He so his. I may not get the best grades in school, but I can definitely read people's expressions. It's a gift.

I can see the effect my words have on him; his cheeks burn with a mild blush and he drops his hands from my shoulders, looking at the floor.

"What!? No, I'm not…no, of course not. Nope, no."

I laugh but keep it quiet enough so he can hardly hear. "Oh okay, it's just you sounded like an overprotective boyfriend." There's a playful tone to my voice that I hope he catches.

He looks up, right into my eyes, "Would that be possible?"

Oh no. "Huh?"

"I mean, would it be possible…for me to be your boyfriend?"

I'm floored. Oh crap, no, double crap! Was this not the topic I wanted to avoid? Answer: yes, yes it was.

Oh god, quick! I must think of something to say. Must think of something to say that doesn't lead him on and gently turns him down.

"Um…look, Tadase. Were good friends, right? But I just don't think you— I! Um, I'm not ready for a boyfriend yet. I know it's been a while since Kairi and I were together and everything but…I want some more time to heal. Is that err, alright?"

Tadase grabs my hand and pulls he to him, wrapping both his arms around my waist in a tight hug. He presses my head to his chest with one hand. I turn my head sideways so I can breathe.

"Of course it's fine. Why are you even asking me, I'm happy with anything you want to do. It's okay. I told you before; I understand. Take all the time you need, I'll be here for you."

This is the kind of thing that makes me want to stab myself with scissors. I don't deserve such a good friend as Tadase. And I hate this lying to him. But it's for his own good. I'm merely trying not to break his heart, which I know I can only keep whole for so long.

The truth has to come out some time, but not now. I wrap my arms around him and hang my hands on his shoulders, saying almost silent apologies of 'I'm so sorry's and 'Please don't hate me's.

We stay like this for another minute or two before he lets me go and bends down to bring our faces closer. I'm afraid hes going to kiss my lips but he turns and kisses my check lightly.

"Do you want me to walk you home?"

"No, that's okay. I'll be fine. The sun's still out. I'll be fine."

"Okay, but hurry, it'll set pretty soon."

"Un."

I walk past him and cross the street before turning and walking down the slightly steep hill to my house. I can feel him watch me, but I don't turn back. I won't let myself.

* * *

The sun is setting as I get home. My mother is in the kitchen making dinner while my father is trying to get Ami to sing and dance for him while he video tapes, like she used to when we were younger. She's watching TV instead and complaining about how she can't hear it when he's talking. Ah how times change.

I go up to my room, shut the door, keep the light off and collapse face first onto my bed. Since my room faces the sun, its illuminated by the orange and pink sky. The color mixes with the pink color of my walls and makes me relax. And boy do I need it.

Today was so exhausting, what with the Tadase thing and then doing some final review in class, and then Ikuto! I only have two boys in my life and I can barely manage. I'm just glad Kukai doesn't like me too or I would REALLY be exhausted.

Just as I'm almost completely relaxed, I turn over…

and jump a mile off my bed.

Just who happens to be lying right to me? Yeah, you guessed it. One of these days I'm not even going to flinch when I find him in my room. He smirks at me, propped up by his arm and lying sideways.

I grab a pillow and put it over my head. "What are you doing here? And more importantly, how do you even get in?"

He lifts the pillow off my face and throws it on my floor. "What are you talking about, I used the balcony." He points to the balcony. I should have known.

"And the reason for being here?"

"Well, we were so rudely interrupted by that little prince, and of course I wanted to see you." He leans over and kisses me on the lips. I feel myself melt a little.

God, I could get used to this.

I wrap my arms around his neck and he moves so that he is directly over me. I feel his tongue against my lips, begging for entrance. I giggle a little, before opening my mouth a tiny bit. But of course, he pries it open wider for me and I resist the urge to moan.

After a while we both need air, and when I break the kiss I can't help commenting, "You just can't get enough of me, can you? Didn't we just do this yesterday?"

He smiles, a real smile this time. Not one of those smirks that still tick me off (but only slightly and only when he's using it to make fun of me). His smile is so cute, I wish he would smile more.

"Lets just say, I can't get enough of you. Plus we were interrupted last time, and I need more of you. I want more of you." He smirks. I narrow my eyes.

"Pervert! You just want me for my body!" I playfully hit his shoulder. But in the back of my mind I can't help but wonder if it's really true. He hasn't exactly told me he likes me or anything and we aren't dating. I shake these thoughts away, that's just silly. Of course he likes me.

…Right?

"Of course I don't want you just for that. But, you do have a nice body. And very, very kissable lips."

As if to prove this he kisses me again. I close my eyes and completely relax, though I do feel bad that he's doing all the work. Our tongues are soon battling for dominance, and I think my tongue is losing. Not that I mind, because he is an AMAZING kisser.

I tangle my hands in his silky black hair, running it through my fingers. He places one hand on my hip and the other against my side to make sure he doesn't crush me. Now that could totally ruin a mood.

All this snogging is really loosening up my tension. I don't think I've ever felt this relaxed since…well, it's been a long time.

And while I'm definitely enjoying myself, I'm still making sure we are being quiet. Actually, more of me and keeping my moaning controlled. I really don't need my mother hearing us and come barging into my room.

Plus, my parents are still in the house, though totally unsuspecting. Ah, but that just makes this all the more exciting!

I feel Ikuto's hand move up to the bottom of my shirt. He slips his hand under my shirt but doesn't wander. I don't know if the risk that we could be caught at any time or if I'm just feeling bold today; I untangle one of my hands and put is over his, sliding it up so its on my side.

He breaks the kiss and looks down at me. "Are you sure? I won't push you into doing anything."

I close my eyes and nod. Then I lean up and kiss him, moving his hand up further, and further…

"Amu! Amu, honey, are you ready for dinner?" my mother's words are thrown upstairs as she climbs the steps and walks down my hallway.

TRIPLE MERDE!!

I throw Ikuto off me and quietly run over to my door, pressing my side against it and put my ear to the door.

"Uh, un! Yeah, I'm just finishing some extra studying!" my voice is high and kind of squeaky. Oh god, must calm down. Must calm down.

My mother's footsteps are coming closer to my door. My heart is pounding so loud I'm sure she can hear it. I take some deep breaths to calm down and even my voice out.

"Oh, okay. Are you okay honey? You sound, a little stressed. What subject are you working on?"

I glance at Ikuto who is sitting cross-legged on my bed, looking at me.

"Uh…Human Anatomy!"

She stops at my door then says, "Oh alright. Then I'll let you finish up. Come down in five minutes though, okay?"

"Sure mom, I'll be right down."

I don't leave my spot until I hear her climb down the stairs. I let out a deep breath I didn't even know I was holding. Then I head by to my bed and sit on the edge near Ikuto.

"Sorry…for the interruption. Or, second interruption." I can feel a small blush spread across my face.

"It's alright. I think I should head home anyway."

"Oh…right."

We both get up from the bed and stand facing each other. I focus on the floor to my right, but I can feel his eyes on me.

"Amu…"

"So, you need to go right. Then, I guess I'll see you another time! Ah, yeah, maybe another day. Maybe tomorrow?"

"Amu," he puts his hand on my face and forces me to look at him "Maybe it wasn't a bad thing, us being interrupted. We were getting pretty heated. Who knows how far we would have gone?"

I blush some more.

"But, I also think we should…take a little break from this. Just for maybe a week. I know the little prince has a crush on you and that you used to like him back in middle school. So, maybe you should give him a try. I don't want you to feel like you have to choose me, I don't want to force this hooking up on you."

He lets his hand drop and walks past me to my nightstand. I hear the jingle of my cell phone charms and the click of it flipping it open. He pushes a few buttons and snaps his shut before walking back over to me.

"But if you do decide on me, then you have my number. Just call me anytime and I'll be with you."

He strokes my face very gently. "Don't worry. We'll meet again. And….sorry that came out so cheesy sounding."

I close my eyes and giggle, but it's a forced giggle. I can't believe my ears; he thinks he's forcing me to snog him! He thinks I want Tadase! I feel like grabbing him and shaking him, shouting "Are you stupid!? I want you! I want Ikuto!!"

But I just stand there, with my eyes closed. I do however grab onto his hand with both of mine. We stand there for a minute, neither of us wanting to go but both of us feeling like we have to for the other.

I open my eyes and look directly at him. He looks at me back and bends down. Just when our lips are inches apart, he stops and pulls back. Then, he turns, walks out onto the balcony and jumps down to the street below.

I'm standing in the middle of room, feeling this sort of déjà vu. Didn't this just happen yesterday?! But this time—I think back to his words— tomorrow there will be no snogging.

I feel as if he just broke up with me. Which is absurd because we weren't even going out in the first place. But… maybe this means I want us to be going out. Maybe this means my heart has already chosen who it wants.

And I can deny the truth no longer.

TBC

**(1) Based on the snogging scale  
****(2) "…and he snogged me too and I think I like him like more than I've liked Tadase even all those years in middle school and Ikuto is an amazing kisser and oh god what do I do?!"  
****(3) Also known as the place I currently reside; Los Angeles, California.**

A/N: I love all my reviewers and every single review I get. Made this chapter a bit longer, hope you enjoy it. Also, yes my style has changed a bit as I am reading a very good series (that's written by a British author) and I'm preparing for my trip to England next year. So, I've incorporated normal british lexicon into my life.


	6. Chapitre 6

**Disclaimer: I do not own any rights to Shugo Chara or any of the characters in this story. **

* * *

Ikuto had said those things for a reason. I stared ahead, transfixed with the sight of the sliding glass door.

But I was looking through it, out into the pitch black sky, littered with stars. I found that uncommon for the Tokyo sky.

My mind was spinning. Our conversation played and replayed in my head. It was amplified a thousand times so I could hear every word, every syllable; I was trying to see where everything went wrong.

The facts I knew were these: Ikuto thinks that I like Tadase. He knows Tadase likes me. He feels that by snogging me he is coming between Tadase and I. He thinks I don't like to snog him and am only doing it because….because what? I'm so desperate for a hook-up?

The thoughts ran through my head, over and over and OVER. Until everything stopped. I heard no more words, I heard no sound. I was standing in my room, cell phone some how in my hand, staring out with wide eyes.

It was all silence until….

"IS HE MAD?!!!"

My yell echoed off the walls, bounced on the floor and came shooting up to hit me in the face. I sank to the floor. This…CANNOT….be happening.

My eyes were closed, tears welling up behind my eye-lids. The mere frustration of it all made me want to cry. But I didn't want to cry, because there was only one person I wanted for comfort and he was the reason I was crying. Isn't life just dandy?

I looked down at my cell phone, now clutched tightly in my hand. It looked at me. I stared at it. It stared at me. We stared at each other and it triple-dared me to call Ikuto. Great, now I'm personifying objects. No wonder Ikuto left.

Maybe I should call, try and explain the situation, maybe politely make it clear to him how horribly, horribly wrong he is.

I opened my phone, but quickly shut it.  
_  
"…take a little break from this… I know the little prince has a crush on you…"_

"_you used to like him back in middle school… should give him a try?..."_

" _I don't want you to feel like you have to choose me…. force this hooking up on you…."_

Spinning, everything was spinning. The fragments shouted at me: "Welcome to the cake shop of agony!!"

I threw the phone on my bed and pulled my knees up to my torso. This would be hard but this is what he wanted. I could handle a little time away from Ikuto…and his perfect lips. If this is what he really wanted, of course I'll play along.

But I will not change my mind about Tadase. My heart would literally rip its self out of my body, tell me to screw myself and walk away, fed up with all the lying I have done to it.

* * *

Well, that went nicely, not.

But I'm not even going to think bout those tests. I mean who cares when the boy you love has told you he doesn't want to snog you anymore because he thinks you like someone else and he is being incredibly dim not realizing you will go crazy if you don't snog him soon.

Anyway, instead I'm going to focus on crunching leaves under my feet. It's quite thought consuming, as there aren't many to crunch. I have to focus and scan the ground. Plus we are now in mid-may so they are all green and not very dry.

Step, crunch. Step, step, step. Scan…. Crunch. Step, step. Crunch! Yes!! "Amu…?"

I snap my head up and look at Nadeshiko, who is staring at me like I have a tiny elf sitting on my head.

"What? Oh, sorry, I was— did you say something?"

Nadeshiko sighs, before speaking, "Alright Amu, what's going on? Something happen with your lover?"

"Wha—No!" I blush "I, I don't know _what_ you are on about."

She smiles, in that way that says 'You can't hide anything from me, girl!' and also 'Pleaseee, do you really think I will buy that?'. Of course. I don't know why I even try anymore.

My head falls so that my chin is almost touching my neck. I can feel that dark grey anime cloud forming over my head. "He said….he said, we shouldn't hook-up anymore"

"Oohhh…"

"Yeah. He thinks I like Tadase. And he thinks I should be with Tadase." My head shoots up, so fast it almost flies off my head. At the same time I stop walking and grab on Nadeshiko.

"What did I do? Did my red bottomosity turn him off?! Am I becoming a…dare I say it; a slut?!!!"

"Okay, okay, hold on. For one, you are not a slut. Two, you're being very dramatic about this whole thing. And three, since when do you have red bottomosity? If you had that you would be snogging more than one guy."

I let go of my death grip on her jacket, calming myself down a bit. I can't help it; I'm just very emotional right now. I blame the lack of snogging – even though it has only been a day.

"You're right. But, I still don't know what to do."

"Maybe you should tell me what happened. Err, calmly please."

I relive the whole dialogue we had in my room last night. It didn't take that long because I mainly told her what he said to me.

She gently links our arms and we start to walk again. "Now, what I really think is going on is not what it seems."

"…huh?"

She laughs. "I mean, Ikuto likes you but he doesn't just want to be your mate, whom you snog. He wants it all or nothing. He probably thinks you really like Tadase but just like to snog him."

"How could be that thick? I obviously like him! Er…well, actually I guess it's not obvious. Ah, jeez."

Nothing is said for a while. I'm not sure what Nadeshiko is thinking about.

"So…I have an idea. Although, you may not like it." She breaks our silence.

"What is it?"

"Well, why don't you try and make Ikuto…jealous?"

"Jealous? How would I do that?"

"Simple; flirt with someone else. Preferably…with someone you know he doesn't like." Her tone is telling me she has someone in mind. Someone...he doesn't like, huh?

She looks at me, waiting for my reaction. I don't get it. Why wouldn't I like that idea? All I have to do is think about who Ikuto doesn't like. Who he doesn't….like….

"Oh my god! Nooooooo."

She shrugs her shoulders.

"I can't use Tadase as my decoy duck! You know he really likes me. And it would totally cause a fight between them!"

"I know it sounds bad. It is awful really, but if you want to find out how Ikuto feels, this is the only way. Well, not the only way: you could just tell him you like him."

I can't do that. I'm too much of a chicken; to afraid I'll get an answer I don't want. But Tadase…

He'll hate me. He will definitely not talk to me and hate me forever. It will be the end of his interest in me; it will be the end of our friendship. Am I really going to put that all on the line? Unless….

"I've got it. All I have to do is make him think I really do rate(1) him, make him think I want us to be more than friends. Then, when Ikuto sees us and something starts, because something will start, Tadase will be so overwhelmed with his dislike of Ikuto that he will be mad at Ikuto and not me.

"They've been fighting for so many years now, I don't think they will ever get along. That's how I will justify this." I finish.

The realization of what I'm going to do hits me and I feel depressed. I'm acting selfish, using one of my best guy friends. Scheming like this.

"I feel awful, like I'm an awful human being." I tell Nadeshiko.

"That's normal. I would be scared for you if you didn't feel like that." she replies.

Right. That's just what I'll tell my conscience when I can't sleep.

* * *

Everyone is staring at me.

Why, oh why did I think I would have the confidence to do this?

I'm wearing the skimpiest outfit Nadeshiko and I could put together from the clothes in my closet, with like five pounds of foundation on plus mascara and I even took the time to put on my false eyelashes. Though I am a little concerned about my eyes being glued shut since I had to put a lot of glue on the entracers so they would stick.

Anyway, the really sad part is that I'm stumbling around in four inch 'do me' pumps trying not to fall. Because I then I would flash everyone a very nice shot of my strawberry print knickers. I'm already showing too much cleavage.

Good lord, and it has to be rather nippy noodles even though it's the middle of May. Well, I blame it being the morning. So, anyway, that is what I look like walking to the park to meet my "date".

I stumble a few more feet until I feel my shoe hit a rock and I completely lose my balance. I flail and shout, frantically grabbing at the air trying to hold on to something. But I can get are air particles. Crap, okay, well, the ground doesn't look too hard. I brace myself for impact, unconsciously squeezing my knees together.

But…I never hit the ground. In fact, I'm sort of frozen and floating in my "don't flash everyone when you fall!" position, elbows tucked in and eyes pressed shut.

I open one eye, and see that, in fact, my face is several inches from the park's hard concrete walk path. I open both eyes and blink at the ground, with what I can imagine is a very perplexed expression on my face.

"Amu?"

Actually, I now realize that there is a pair of arms encircling me. One is around my waist and the other near my shoulders. I turn around and see Tadase staring down at me, looking half amused, and half concerned.

We are in quite an interesting position. If anyone walked by, they would think we were just ballroom dancing and Tadase had just spun me around and dipped me.

I jump to my feet so as to be standing, but his arms don't leave me. "Oh! Hello, Tadase," I look around "wonderful weather we're having, isn't it?" My purse is hanging from my forearm, as I'm clutching his jacket. His hands are on my waist.

"Sure, if you like cold mornings." He looks very amused now. I feel like an idiot. I _knew_ I should have opted for shorter shoes. But as Nadeshiko said when I brought this concern, "Amu, since when do ballet flats say, 'I'm sexy, I know it, you know it, let us snog'? No."

But at least our plan was working. I mean, Tadase could hardly stop looking at me, and I don't mean my face. His eyes wandered from my fully exposed shoulders to my almost fully exposed legs, back up and then back down again. It was making me blush.

Oh, how I wish I would have brought a coat!! It wouldn't have helped cover my legs but at least I wouldn't be showing this much skin.

"So…." I move my head from right and then to left, trying to catch Tadase's eyes. It worked, he snapped his attention instantly back to my face, blushing slightly at realization of how he was looking at me, "are you ready for our….date?"

"Oh! Yeah, Definitely. I mean….I never thought you would go out with me this soon. Are you over Kairi now?"

I pause. What? Kairi? Why are we talking about Kai— Oh, _merde_. I absolutely forgot about the "excuse" I had used.

"Um…actually, I think I might be. It is a bit early to tell. However, I think I shall be soon." I throw in a smile, to seem sincere.

He smiles back, looking rather pleased. "Wonderful. Then I push you any further. Let's just see what happens."

Oh dear _Gott in Himmel_, he is talking about us— as proper boyfriend and girlfriend! Okay, okay, don't panic. "Yes, let's." I smile back. I can get through this.

I wonder how long I will have to stay with Tadase on this "date". Actually, I don't even know if our plan will work. There aren't many people out right now. I don't even know if he comes here a lot – or at all.

Tadase and I continue to walk, talking about many different things. Most of it is about school, or summer break. Well, I don't care if our plan fails. Maybe it means something. Like, destiny or fate, or some other crap like that.

Tadase grabs my hand as we walk, just holding on tight. Crickey! The plan is going better than I expected. I thought I would have to do everything. And in fact, this feels really nice since Tadase's hands are so warm and I am so freezing.

I glance down casually, and decide to level up my flirting. That's the whole reason I'm here, right? Yes.

I casually lace my fingers through his, and glance up at him to watch his reaction. I see him blush and mutter a soft, "Amu-san"

I giggle. "Do you remember when you used to call me Hinamori-san all the time? Even after you first confessed to me?"

"Well, I was always taught to be very formal. Plus, it was just habit," he laughs "You didn't exactly confess back, so I was a little apprehensive to call you just 'Amu'."

Suddenly he stops and turns toward me. Our hands are still laced together. He has a very serious look on his face.

"In fact, I don't think you've ever told me you like me. Or…maybe you don't like me? Please, Amu, tell me. Are my feelings never going to be returned" he questions me.

I don't know how to respond. Yes. No. I did. I was going to. I liked you for soooo long when we were younger. I like someone else now. My mouth is hanging open slightly, not enough for a bug to fly into but wide enough that I look like I'm lost for words. Which I am.

"I….I…I mean—" I can't say anything. Suddenly, Tadase is leaning forward. I close my mouth as his face comes closer. His eyes are closed and my mine are closing slowly. His lips barely brush mine before I hear a loud "OI!!" and the sound of footsteps.

Tadase leans back a little and we both turn our heads to see a person running towards us. The person is tall, skinny, carrying a violin. They come closer and I realize it is a guy coming towards us. A guy…who looks a lot like Ikuto.

Wait….

Oh my god! That _is_ Ikuto!

"Ah!!" I exclaim, pointing at him right as he comes up to us.

He rips our hands apart and grabs my hand. "Don't you ever," he makes a short pause to catch more breath "try to kiss her again, or else. She is mine." Then, he walks in between Tadase and I, pulling me with him.

He is walking really fast. I turn around to look at Tadase, who is just standing there with a shocked expression, watching us walk away.

I turn to look at the back of Ikuto's head. "Ikuto, wait."

He doesn't say anything. In fact, he walks faster. He is still holding my hand. "Ikuto."

Ikuto leads us out of the park and across the intersection. We walk along some shops and buildings before he turns a corner and we start to walk down an alley.

"Ikuto!" I have no idea where we are going. We're near a few apartment complexes and some houses now. I'm trying not trip in my heels again. We walk down another alley but I've had enough.

"IKUTO!!" I scream and wrench my hand from his. I stop in the middle of the alley. He stops too, but doesn't turn to look at me. I'm panting and glaring at him. My feet are screaming from the distance they have had to cover today, in heels no less! I don't know where we are, and he hasn't been responding this whole time! I'm really peeved.

But…I am happy he is here with me. Because….it means the plan WORKED! W-o-r-k-e-d, worked! Yeah!

Finally, he turns around, staring down at me. His hands are in his pockets. He glances at my outfit and gives a little smirk. "Wow, Amu, never knew you had such _nice_ clothes."

"Shut up."

"They suit you really well," he takes a step toward me "the shirt is nice. It is good to know you have some sort of chest."

I can feel my blush burning on my cheeks. I draw in my arms and fold them over my chest.

He steps even closer and takes one hand out of his pocket. "And this skirt looks really good on you," he gently places his hand on my lower thigh, "I always thought you should show more of your great legs." His hand moves up my thigh.

I can hardly concentrate on anything other than his hand, but I pull myself together enough to take a step back. "You're such a tease." I try to put as much annoyance in my voice as possible.

He laughs "Oh, that's funny. I do believe _you_ are the tease. Your mother let you out of the house looking like that?"

"Alright, okay, I get it. You don't like the outfit. Fine. But did you have to ruin my date?"

I've come too far not to keep up with the plan. I see his face visibly harden, but only for a second before he regains his smirk. Yessss. I do think it was successful. Ikuto is so jealous!

"I didn't think you would actually go out with him. So, I guess that means my theories were correct."

Oh….fuck. Noooooo, crap. Double crap. Alright, play it cool. I can still win this if I play it right. I put my hands on my hips and tilt my head up at him. "Maybe they were. Maybe they weren't. I guess it's up for you to decide."

He takes several steps forward while I match him and take several back. It isn't long until my back hits the wall of the alley and I'm cornered. He places both hands on either side of my head and leans down close.

"Actually, I don't think I was right." he moves his lips so they are merely centimeters apart, then moves over my cheek. I'm starting to get excited and anxious at the same time.

"I think," he softly begins to kiss my jaw, and then makes his way down to my neck. I can't help but give a soft moan, "that I was very very wrong. In fact, I think maybe this is all a set up."

All the colour drains from my face. Oh dear god, I think I am busted.

He looks me straight in the eye "Why else would you wear that outfit, go out with that little King, especially to a place you know I always go to? Yes, I think you wanted me to see you. I think you wanted me to see you and get jealous and wish I had never told you we should take a break."

We are both silent for a minute. Ikuto looking smug at knowing this is the truth and waiting for me to confirm what we both already know to be true. I'm trying to figure how Ikuto is so right all the freaking time.

"I hate you, you know it all." I admit.

He smiles this time and pulls me to his chest so he can wrap his arms around me. One arm is around my waist while the other is stroking my hair. He kisses the top of my head, then puts his hands on my shoulders and leans down.

His face comes close to mine; his lips are just inches away. I shut my eyes waiting for the kiss. I wait for what seems like a hundred years before opening my eyes. He is smiling at me again.

"What?"

"You'll get your kiss later."

"Oh? And when would later be?"

He grabs my hand again and starts walking, pulling me with him. "Soon. Very soon. See that building just to the left of the alley?"

I lean my head and peer around the corner of the alley's wall. There is an apartment building right there. It's huge, with a very nice modern yet traditional appearance.

"Yes. Why?"

"That's where I live. I want you to see it."

"Oh, okay. ….Eh!!?"

"What? What happened?" Ikuto looks at me over his shoulder, mildly concerned.

"Nothing happened. I'm just surprised."

We enter the building and walk up the many flights of stairs until we reach the fourth floor.(2) There are only three doors on this floor. Two are close to each other, on the same wall facing the stairs while the other one is only about ten feet from the stairs.

Ikuto takes out his keys and steps to the door closest to the stairwell.

Why would you be surprised?"

"Well, I'm just surprised that you would bring me here."

He inserted the key in the door's lock, turned it, and pushed on the handle. The door opened, revealing a wood-floored entry way and beyond that the biggest apartment in the entire building. And it absolutely the prettiest place I have ever seen.

Ikuto closes the door and takes off his shoes. I do the same.

"Why wouldn't I bring my girlfriend to my apartment?" he asks, casually.

I freeze, shoes gripped tightly in my hand. I turn around frantically, looking everywhere.

Ikuto looks a little alarmed. "What are you searching for?"

"Your girlfriend. Where is she? I need to meet her." I reply

He smiles and places his hands on my waist, turning me around. He uses one hand to lift my face up. "She is you, silly." And before I can say anything, Ikuto presses his lips against mine. I wrap my arms around his neck and my brain literally stops functioning.

TBC

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**(1)like  
(2)I do not know how many levels there are in apartment complexes in Japan, as I have not been to Japan....yet. So I'm just guessing.**

**A/N: I could have written more, but I think where I stopped is good enough.  
I'm not making any promises, but I should be able to have the next chapter out by February.  
I'm interested in seeing where my readers are from. If you would like, include what country you're from in your review! Thank you :) See you next chapter!**


	7. Author Update

**Hello!**

So, um, I said I would update this in February….of 2009. Sorry about that! I kind of stopped watching/reading Shugo Chara and then I forgot where I was even going with this story.

But I started working on where I left off and I promise to update this soon! To everyone who reviewed and put where they are from in their review, thank you! I'm happy people like this and I'm also happy that some even read my Author Notes. And yes, I love Confessions of Georgia Nicolson.

Okay, anyway, back to writing. Look forward to another chapter!

- WVG


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